Unlike previous years, I find 2025 difficult to name. The year 2023 was easily an annus mirabilis, for it was indeed miraculous despite the calamities it brought—calamities that initially made me think it was an annus horribilis. The year 2024 certainly felt like a full circle, as things were coming to an end and new beginnings quietly unfolded. Meanwhile, 2025… oh, there are simply too many adjectives to attribute to it! Either it is unsummarizable, or the English dictionary was deprived of the word that can fully capture it.
So, without further ado, here is a recap of how each day in my 2025 counted!
Q1: Leaving Baggages Behind
Quite similar to my 2023, Q1 of my 2025 started with a bang!
Just like almost every January, January 2025 was another hangover month. The highlight of my January was simply keeping myself afloat while drowning myself in two assignments for which I had applied for two delayed assessment permits (DAPs). In the midst of that turmoil, a lot of exciting things actually happened: experiencing the thickest snowfall during my stay in the UK (which happened exactly at the most magical time for me!), watching Hamilton with my dear Zaynab, receiving a pre-birthday surprise from my Behaviour Change besties (Sneha and Zaynab), and getting a birthday surprise from my two dear flatmates, Mbak Endah and Mbak Tata. Mind you, I had never had my birthday celebrated with a tumpeng in my 26 years of life, so their gesture became a core memory for me—thank you! Also, early that month was the first time I got a new smartphone (a flagship version), as Mbak Tata brought it from Indonesia for me (this will be important to the plot, I promise). Bottom line: I was trying to find the joy in the looming darkness of January.
Then February came like a trainwreck. Well, it actually started AMAZINGLY. I celebrated the submission of my assignments by watching my celebrity crush, Asa Butterfield, perform his limited one-man show Second Best. I couldn’t stop smiling that entire evening, and I still smile whenever I reminisce about it. Being in the right place (London) at the right time (Jan-Feb 2025) to watch him perform felt truly like a Divine will.
However, sometimes the brightest light casts the boldest shadow. Not long after that happiest moment, I went on a two-day trip to Birmingham and Manchester. I met friends in both cities, but Manchester… oh, you will always be remembered! My new smartphone was pickpocketed there, to my surprise, as I thought pickpockets were only ubiquitous in London. It was nerve-wracking in so many ways: I had just been fined £50 a few hours earlier for getting on the wrong train, and I hadn’t backed up any photos on my new smartphone. I was DEVASTATED. I had been losing many things that mattered deeply to me at that time. It was truly a test and a reminder for me: humans actually own nothing. All is His and it will all return to Him. It became another chapter in my overarching lesson of letting go.
Thankfully, Ramadhan—which coincided with March—was just around the corner. Ramadhan in London was super fun! I toured several London mosques for two main reasons: to experience their taraweeh and to hunt for their free iftar, hehe. It was fun and soul-relaxing, especially since I was almost always with friends. One of my iftar sessions at AFC Wimbledon was unexpectedly “crashed” by Mesut Özil, and I got to listen to his pre-iftar speech—who would have thought?! Then, as quickly as it came, Ramadhan ended in the blink of an eye, and it ended beautifully, as I got many friends to celebrate it with. Many friends were staying in my flat, and it was also the first time I hosted a Ramadhan open-house—clearly another core memory. Yet March was also the last month of my second-term classes, which meant two things: drowning in deadlines again and mentally preparing to say goodbye to my Master’s journey (it ended so quickly!). I did not like that at all 🥺
Q2: Cleaning the Cabin Before Take Off
April, ah April. April was the month my heart and soul were cleansed. All praise be to Allah, I was blessed with the opportunity to perform umrah in April, coinciding with the Islamic month of Syawwal. Before departing for London, I had pledged to myself not to travel anywhere else outside the UK before visiting the two holy cities, Mecca and Madina. Alhamdulillah, Allah granted my prayer.
Previously, I had dreamed of performing hajj from abroad to bypass the long Indonesian hajj queue. I even did the math to see whether it would be possible during my stay in the UK last year, but the math didn’t add up. So I resorted to umrah, which was no less of a blessing. Coming back to London after umrah wasn’t as easy, though. Nobody prepares you for the “post-umrah depression”. I also had a big portfolio assignment due in May, so I spent most of April finishing that, with occasional weekend travel with friends.
Early May was dedicated to finishing that big portfolio assignment (big because it was for a 30-credit module). I spent many days coworking with Sneha and Zaynab at Sneha’s place at Urbanest King’s Cross, which offered a spectacular view of Islington and the railways leading to King’s Cross and St Pancras International Station. This month, UCL Student Union also held extra classes for postgraduate students, and I participated in a social hackathon and a co-design workshop. I remember my heart was thrumming with excitement at plunging myself deeper into academia. I even talked to Zaynab at UCL East about the prospect of doing a PhD before I turn 30—something I used to dread. It suddenly felt less scary now that I had discovered the joy of research. Perhaps that was the beginning of withdrawal symptoms, as my Master’s was nearing its end.
And then June came. June was unexpectedly memorable! A lot of things happened in June. So, as a consequence of mindlessly saying “yes” to every holiday invitation in April and May (due to mid-assignment stress), I had three consecutive weekends booked in June for holidays! Apparently, I became that person who optimises summer for travel, haha. In just one month, I went to Manchester (to retake all the stolen phone photos!) and Liverpool (doing that The Beatles pilgrimage!) with Mbak Endah, to Brighton and Seven Sisters with Mbak Tania and Mbak Iza, to Egypt (Cairo and Alexandria, you are missed dearly!) with Mbak Endah and Intan, and finally to York with Mbak Endah and Mbak Tata. Those travels unearthed a lot about me: my likes, dislikes, and what truly sparks my joy. Those travels, and a particular trip, healed a big part of me which I knew needed healing, but didn’t know how.
In June, I also met my childhood hero: Chris Hadfield, the first Canadian astronaut to command the International Space Station! Never had I ever dared to dream of meeting him in person… so I got goosebumps, and genuinely felt like crying when I heard him play “Space Oddity” on the stage of the Royal Festival Hall. I also began doing interviews for my dissertation. It was my first time interviewing people in English. It was terrifying at first, but then it became thrilling over time. Alhamdulillaah for June.
Q3: Leaping Through the Sky and Preparing for Descent
In July, I immersed myself even deeper into academic work. I was still conducting interviews for my dissertation while beginning to draft the full report. To support the process, I attended a one-week dissertation writing course organised by the UCL Faculty of Brain Sciences ACC. It also became my way of gradually and slowly letting go of my Master’s life—by savouring and making the most of every moment and opportunity.
A lot of other things happened in July: I photographed my friend’s pre-wedding shoot in front of Big Ben, I became Mata Garuda Britania Irlandia’s GEMA committee, went to Kew Gardens for the second time, and submitted a proposal for the Geneva Challenge. So, in between June and July, my behaviour change friends (Sneha, Zaynab, Otylia, and Ivan) and I worked on a submission for the Geneva Challenge, developing intervention ideas to improve the livelihood of Rohingya refugees in response to that year’s migration theme. We didn’t make it to the finals, but it surely was a valuable experience!
I then ended July by going on a Scotland trip with Mbak Endah and Mbak Tata. People say you should save Scotland for the last when travelling in the UK because its beauty triumphs over other cities. I disagree on that. I would say that every city in the UK has their own beauty and virtue, and Edinburgh and Glasgow don’t necessarily outshine other UK cities. But I would say that Inverness and the Scottish Highlands? Truly breathtaking, like something straight out of an adventure novel.
In August, I was wrapping up my dissertation, with only one month left before the deadline. I submitted it to my dear supervisors, Lucy and Elise, for feedback. The revisions require rigorous effort—I received over 140 comments!—but every single one certainly improved the quality of my report.
In between working on my dissertation, I finally watched Romeo and Juliet at Shakespeare’s Globe Theatre with Intan! That was a dream come true, as I had been dreaming of watching a Shakespeare play inside The Globe since junior high school, alhamdulillaah. Additionally, I played one final table tennis game with Sneha at her place before she returned to India for good. I also watched a show about stars and the universe at Peter Harrison’s Planetarium at Greenwich with Mbak Iza before it closed for 2 years for renovation—another dream fulfilled. Oh, how my mind was playing that particular grand song from La La Land when I was inside the planetarium (iykyk)!
Among all the months in 2025, the start of September is the one I vividly remember. On September 1st, I submitted my dissertation on UCL’s Moodle at 2 am. Later that day, I met Mbak Iza at Paddington Station to head to Stansted Airport. I celebrated my dissertation submission by going on a trip to Türkiye, Georgia, and Armenia with my best friends! I spent three days in Istanbul with Mbak Iza: wandering through the winding streets of Istanbul, visiting Hagia Sophia and other majestic Turkish mosques, tasting the famous Turkish ice cream, getting scammed by a random man outside a tram station (beware of this!), being randomly checked by Turkish police outside the Galata tram station, napping under a tree in Gülhane Park, and so many other things. After three days in Istanbul, we met Mbak Endah and Intan at Sabiha Gökçen International Airport and flew to Georgia. From Georgia, we chartered a car to cross the Georgian-Armenian border. The cross-border experience was certainly a memory to remember😉
After a joyful, celebratory week, I finally came back to my reality in London, where I had to begin saying more goodbyes to a lot of things. It was bittersweet, but emphasis on the bitter. I packed my belongings for air shipment, helped my friend pack, and took pre-graduation pictures with Mbak Endah, Mbak Tania, and Mbak Iza. I had one final lunch with Zaynab at Warung Nusantara before she left for Sierra Leone, and one final night stroll with my flatmates to Tower Bridge and Battersea Power Station. I also presented my dissertation at the Behaviour Change Mini Conference during the induction session for the next cohort. I said goodbye to my lovely lecturers—Leslie, Danielle, Lucy, and Elise. Finally, on September 30th 2025, I bid farewell to the flat I had called home for the last 12 months 🥺
Q4: Free Falling (or Floating?)
October began with a realisation: London was slowly evicting me. Without a flat, Mbak Endah and I hopped from one accommodation to another for the first 15 days of October. I had forgotten how expensive it was to live nomadically in London without a proper monthly rental! Everything also felt like it was spiralling in some way. I had to spend my last days in London disputing with my ex-landlord over a missing gas key, while simultaneously trying to steady my own heart, which struggled deeply with saying goodbye to London.
On October 3rd, Mbak Endah and I went for a final trip to Montenegro—a visa-free option for us after failing to secure a Schengen visa for a European trip. That trip felt different from the Türkiye, Georgia, and Armenia trip I had before. Montenegro felt serene, but final. Montenegro itself was not necessarily the most impressive destination compared to others I had visited, but somehow it was a perfect final destination to conclude a year of adventure. I remember writing a reflection on my tablet above the German skies aboard a Ryanair flight… oh, such a feeling to remember (p.s. Ryanair was not bad, it landed safely and smoothly instead of merely arriving, hehe).
Then, coming back to London, I spent my final days there finishing my farewell tour. I walked around UCL, the Senate House Library, and King’s Cross. I reunited with my nutrition seniors who were just starting their Master’s and played tourist once again, so that’s kinda nice. On my last day in London, I visited Freud’s Museum and Tate Britain before ordering an Uber to Heathrow Terminal 4.
And Allah, in His mercy, has His own ways to cheer His subjects. He cheered me up during that difficult transition by blessing me with another opportunity to set foot, again, in Mecca. Alhamdulillaah.
So, my life continued after London.
I had to admit, it was such an ugly transition. My heart and soul were still out there, while my body had returned to Indonesia. Now, don’t get me wrong, I don’t necessarily hate Indonesia. However messy Indonesia is, it is still my homeland. But, I also had to admit that I loved the person I became outside Indonesia, outside my old routine. I felt as though I had outgrown the old version of Alima. The Alima that I discovered in London—and in other corners of the world—was the best version of Alima.
Thankfully, I came back to warm, loving arms that softened the crash and made it less hurtful (because yes, returning to my old routine felt like being a meteorite crashing down to Earth). The rest of October, November, and December were filled with my personal agenda of reconnecting with old friends. Just as I had bid farewell to them before I went to London, I returned to say hello again (and bring souvenirs, of course, hahah). I travelled to Jakarta (where I also met Otylia and her husband, who came from Singapore!) and to Boyolali.
I was also incredibly grateful to have been invited by Nisa to teach nutrition at a private university in Yogyakarta. Interestingly, to think of it, Nisa and I had been inviting each other for work opportunities for years. So I didn’t return home entirely jobless, even though I’m still actively looking for other opportunities (fun fact, I applied and got interviewed for a research associate position at the University of Aberdeen, even though it didn’t work out eventually!), alhamdulillah. The opportunity to become a lecturer should have been a dream come true, since it had been my dream and end goal. But instead, it didn’t feel like it, and it unearthed other doubts in me. Finally, I end the year with a reflection Zoom call with my UK besties, which braced me to welcome the new year.
So, if I had to choose a single word to describe my 2025, it would be “adventure”.
In 2025, I ventured outwards, physically. All praise be to Allah, I finally lived my dream of becoming a traveller, journeying to places around the world that once felt distant and almost unreal. There are still many places I long to see—Morocco, Italy, France, and, honestly, the rest of Europe, hahah—but I am deeply grateful for every destination I was blessed to experience.
“I wanted to go to faraway places and meet with endless varieties of foreign languages and peoples. I wished to rove, finding my direction through reading the stars of constellations. I wanted to cross fields and deserts, to be burned by the sun until I blistered, to be shook by the assaulting wind, and shrink from being gripped by cold. I wanted a life that was thrilling, filled with conquest. I wanted to live! To feel the essence of being!” (Andrea Hirata in Edensor)
In 2025, I also ventured inwards, spiritually. In Q2, my weary heart was somehow cleansed. Though it remains imperfect in many ways, it felt as though it had been injected with optimism and a renewed positive outlook on life. Throughout the year, I unlearned and learned so much about myself. There were things that I once thought suited me, but now feel misplaced. There are things I now no longer tolerate, because I have learned to value myself more.
Perhaps the greatest lesson of 2025 was learning to not be afraid of dreaming big and not to be afraid of changing plans.
In 2025, I met many people with bold visions for themselves and the world around them. Strangely, they made me feel small and behind—in a good way. I may not share their privilege, but why would that prevent me from having the same dream? Sure, I might need to work harder to achieve them, but that doesn’t mean that I can’t and shouldn’t aspire to them. I left for London knowing what I wanted to be and do once I returned to Indonesia, but as the year ended, I questioned my plans.
If your life blueprint no longer matches what your heart desired, I guess that’s natural. Because how could you still want the exact same thing when life has exposed you to the endless possibilities, alternate universes you have never imagined before?
The change in your character and dreams is not a sign of indecisiveness, but rather a symptom of learning and growth. After all, after everything you’ve been through the past 11 months, it would be such a shame if nothing changes at all.
So, be confident in your doubts. Always anchor your heart and vision to the end of the tunnel—Him. Chin up, walk calmly, and always, always, ask for His guidance in every step of your way.
(August 21st, 2025, 00.14, my flat)
Verily, with hardship comes ease. My 2025 wasn’t all rainbows. There were plenty of trials. But alongside those trials, He granted me ease: through the presence of lovely company and help in every step. He also blessed me with more than I had ever asked for or dared to imagine. Alhamdulillaah. So, dear future Alima, if you ever feel low, look back at your adventures in 2025. Allah certainly loves you, as long as you strive not to displease Him, you need not worry!
May I not lose the version of myself I discovered in 2025: the adventurous one, the explorer.
Thank you to those who have coloured my year, thank you to those who have caught me as I landed back home, and thank you for reading the longest annual reflection I have ever written so far—despite it being published very late, hehe.
As I walk these streets alone, through this borough I call home
Upon the baron fields of Highbury ‘neath the stadiums of stone
Through the turnstiles at The Angel, see the homeless on the green
From The Cally to The Cross, and every shithole in between
Pass the church, the mosque, a crack den, and the offie on the corner
[…]
‘Cause the manor might be changing, but the people still remain
North London forever
Whatever the weather
These streets are our own
And my heart will leave you never
My blood will forever
Run through the stone.
Never watched soccer matches before and was not even a fan, but visiting Arsenal’s Emirates Stadium was a special moment, as it was located near where I lived. Arsenal’s chant “The Angel (North London Forever)” by Louis Dunford felt deeply personal. I’ve lived in North London twice in my life (East Finchley back in 2005-2006 and York Way, Islington in 2024-2025), and I certainly am looking forward to any future opportunities and possibilities to come back there, to home.
Midnight Getaway 