Probabilitas

Morning Coffee

Bisa jadi kita adalah..
Muda-mudi saling jatuh hati,
Yang tak tahu bagaimana untuk mengawali.
Bisa jadi kita adalah..
Manusia yang pernah saling cinta,
Namun pada waktu yang berbeda,
Hingga rasa itu sirna.
Bisa jadi kita adalah..
Pemimpi yang membuta dari realita,
Terus berharap bahwa di seberang ada gejolak yang sama.

Atau!
Bisa jadi kau adalah penyaji kopiku di pagi hari..
Dan aku adalah pengikat dasimu sebelum kau pergi..
Bisa jadi kita adalah sepasang insan surgawi.

Atau..
Bisa jadi kita adalah sandiwara terhebat karangan-Nya.

-CA

A Paragraph, If I May Say..

CA 2

..and talking about him beyond his knowledge just makes me more like a sinner and a desperate lover. At first I thought my word vomit will bring ease to my heart, and now.. well, I hope it does.

She and I

DSCN3480She was breathlessly amazing.

When we were toddlers, we used to play under a gigantic tree near the lake. Hide and seek was our favorite game. I closed my eyes and faced the tree while she hide behind the bushes. It was so easy to spot her long hair. I always won since her tiny foot weren’t able to run before me.

When we were tired enough, we lay under the tree. She liked to point the canopy and mumbled, “When we’re taller, promise me you will keep me company while climbing those branches. We can sit there as we watch the sun drops.”

I nodded at her and we made a pinky-promise.

Years past and we have grown older and taller. We went different ways yet we were still friends; She was in New York, I was in Chicago, and that tree was still in Minnesota. The promise we made is impossible to be fulfilled.

One day, when I was on a one-month-duty in Kenya, I received her wedding invitation. She was going to held the ceremony under our tree. Despite the distance I had to cover, I came to her wedding.

I saw her. She was as beautiful as always. She was breathtaking.

I stared at the canopy we used to stare at and I couldn’t believe that it was the time she got married under that tree. She was married to another guy and she hadn’t climbed our tree with me.

At that moment, I thought, if she could no longer climb the tree with me, I could go by my self. I climbed that tree and sat as I watched the sun dropped. It was so beautiful. The sky’s color turned as gorgeous as her hair.

When the sun finally dropped, I dropped my self down.

Enam Belas

47

Enam belas,
Jadilah tahun yang baik.
Tahun penuh cinta dan bahagia.
Tahun ketika harapan tak sekedar angan belaka.
Jadilah tahun yang mendewasakan dan hilangnya keraguan.

Kepada para terkasih,
Terima kasih untuk kembali mengingat
Apa yang dalam hidup ini hanya sekedar terlibat.

Dengan haru berbalut rindu, 29 Januari 2015
Aku yang senantiasa berusaha membahagiakanmu.

2015: Another Chance

Ciao!
Tonight is new year’s eve in the country I live in and fireworks are already on to greet the so-called new year. In the last minutes of 2014, I’d like to note lessons I’ve learnt and deeds I’ve done this year. I guess having a little recall about the year we’ve just passed and muse about it on new year’s eve is a good thing to do. We always need to evaluate ourselves and new year just seems to be another perfect moment for change.

Before I write my 2015 resolution, here’s a look to my 2014 resolution:

Cut Alima’s 2014 Resolutions:
1. Try harder to be close to God.
2. Study hard, focus on my future, and put my spiritual and mental needs in my top priority.
3. Be selfless, kind, brave, honest, and smart. Also, be more alive and young.
4. Face my life whatever it takes and always be grateful.
5. Live happily!
6. Be smart like my junior high school senior,X (oh God, I believe he will be an important people in Indonesia later, maybe he will be a president).

This 2014, I gladly say that I’m progressing on my 2014 resolution. I feel younger and more alive than I was back in 2013. I enrolled to my dream school and -thank’s God!- got accepted. I met new friends and experienced many rare things which are precious. Well.. I did manage to live happier. Praise to God for all of that :’)

And what have I learnt from 2014?
1. Never rush things. Live every moment, every minute, every second you live. You can never go back to change things, so, live every moment so you won’t have to regret anything.
2. Never be ‘the best person according to people’s opinion’, but be the best version of you. It’s your life and no one ever have the right to tell you who you are. However, be opened for people’s opinion, they might help you to change into a better person.
3. Have a leap of faith on everything you’re afraid of. Try things, you might succeed.
4. Never think that tomorrow will come. Do everything as soon as possible or you might loose the chance.
5. Sometimes when we failed getting what we want after giving our best effort on it, we just have to pause. Maybe it’s not our turn.. maybe our turn is tomorrow or next year. We should be patiently waiting, move closer to God, keep thinking positively.
6. Karma does exist.

Now that I’ve learnt a lot of things in 2014, I just hope that I won’t forget it and carry them with me when 2015 come.

To be honest, I have also done bad things back in 2014. I regret things I’ve done and things I haven’t done and I guess there’s no way to come back and change it. So, I’m just thinking.. I think I should give my self another chance on the upcoming year. Another chance to be better, another chance to be happier. And I think you should, too.

To greet 2015, I decided to edit my 2014 year resolution and turn it to be my 2015 resolution. I wasn’t able to check every point on the list and so did on my 2013 resolution. Now I start thinking that we can never feel enough, moreover when it comes to uncountable things such as happiness or intelligence. So, checking points on new year resolution doesn’t really matter anymore; progressing is what matters.

And so, I hereby present you my 2015 resolution:

Cut Alima’s 2015 Resolutions:
1. Be closer to God and obey God’s rules the best I can. 
2. Study hard and focus on my future.
3. Put my spiritual and mental needs in my top priority.

4. Be selfless, kind, brave, honest, and smart. Not to forget, be more aliveyoung, and ladylike. Be a better person!
5. Face my life bravely, always be grateful, and always live happily!
6. Be a full-of-knowledge person.

So, now, let’s step back and have a toast for ourselves, for good deeds we’ve done. I guess all of us deserves a hug. Nevertheless, let’s say goodbye to those nasty deeds we’ve done, to those heartbreaks. Say goodbye to all traumas and to those fake smiles. Tomorrow we’ll be in 2015 and though it’s just another day another year, let’s vow to be a better person on the days ahead. Let’s give another chance to ourselves and other people.

So, HAPPY NEW YEAR!
May God be with us. *cheers

Arrivederci, Readers ;)
May our upcoming days full of happiness. Again, happy new year :)
-CA

I am still learning. -Michelangelo