Dear Childhood Dreams

22

Dear Teacher, Chef, Journalist, Vlogger, Scriptwriter, Director, Diplomat, and Writer.

I’m truly sorry for abandoning you these last eight years. These last eight years were kinda rough. I learned so many things till I was unable to make time for pampering you.

These past eight years, I learned things that had never crossed my mind before. I started realizing that paying bills cannot be done in a blink of an eye. I started acknowledging that food and rent are two essential things that don’t come cheap. I started counting my daily, monthly, and annual needs. Then I started thinking, how in Earth I could possibly afford it? And then, gradually, I started believing that I need a secure job to secure my future.

Ah, yes. I’m truly sorry for not believing you. I’m sorry for questioning you.
Yes, people spoiled me. They told me that you can’t give me a decent living. They told me that all of you are not reliable. They told me to start looking for another dream; a dream that have a respectable place in this world. A dream that is highly valued by society. “Ever consider being a doctor?” they said, as if being a doctor can be done as easy as lying.
Moreover, they pushed me to consider a still-fictional thing: family. “What about your child if you’re a movie director? You’re gonna leave them behind, aren’t you?” said their facial expression when I told them about one of you. “What about your husband if you’re assigned to stay in another country for five years? Don’t you think that the job ‘diplomat’ doesn’t suit you?” others said.

But, I’m not going to blame other people. It is me who is too naive to believe. It’s me who believe their shallow thoughts. I must have had believed that things like that doesn’t matter. A decent living can be pursued by any kind of livelihood as long as I enjoy what I do. I should realize sooner that my happiness is my priority and that my happiness can be seized by being what I want to be.

However, I guess it’s too late. I’m already poisoned by those thoughts. I’ve already seen them as some logical reasons. Maybe this is what people call as ‘growing up’. But if this is really is ‘growing up’, I guess growing up also means the death of childhood dreams.

So, if all of you are what used to be some precious seeds, I’m sorry for not giving any fertilizer to you. I’m sorry for not watering you these past eight years. I’m sorry to let you get crippled and forgotten over the years.

But, there’s one thing I want to say.
I really hope that I haven’t killed you all; I hope you’re just staying dormant. I wish that one day you can grow well and healthy. I wish that one day you can be a proof that people are wrong condescending you.

Sincerely,
The girl who pledged to encourage other children to look after their precious seeds.

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Are You Sure That You Love “The Movie”, Not The Touching Plot Nor The Cast?

Are you sure that you love the movie, not the touching plot nor the cast?

Well, that is a question you must ask to yourself after watching a movie.

We, people who don’t know anything about the film industry sometimes say “I like that movie” and “I hate that movie” without any further thinking. Well, I admit it that sometimes I do. And after I thought for a long time, I think that judging something without further thinking is rude. Especially when it comes to movies.

As a viewer of a movie, I think it is easy to assess how good is a movie or how interesting is the movie. We, viewers, want satisfaction from what we watch and we always have that thinking of what satisfy us is a good thing. It depends on us, on our taste. We people have different lists of ‘things that satisfy us’. Like happy endings, romantic plot, good looking actor/actress, etc. And.. yeah, you can bring that list when you judge a thing you want to buy, but you can’t bring that list when you watch a movie. By judging a movie based on your list, I guess you do an unfair thing, you decide whether something is good or not by your taste, not by the quality.

I’m not someone who’s in the film industry or someone who have made big hits movies before, but as someone who have experienced the life of a movie maker (Well, not really. It’s just a school project), I know how hard it is to make a movie. Making a twisty plot which is able to entertain people yet still containing a moral value is hard. Moreover, directing the casts to act like how they should based on the script is also hard. Editing the movie. Adding special effects to the movie. All of those steps involves creativity and patience.

Behind The Scenes

So.. I guess it is not fair to judge a movie based on our list of ‘things that satisfy us’. I guess those immature words such as “She’s not pretty!” or “Hello?! I need a happy ending!” or “It’s not entertaining at all! All those people do is just wandering around like saints and say good things! I want a more alive characters, characters who say f*ck like every one minute!” is not fair. Well, what if the scriptwriter and the director made the movie like that? What if in the script, the female characters are described as ‘a not-very-appealing girl’? We don’t know.

Sure, we’re totally allowed to comment a movie, but our comments should be based on reasonable things. When we comment a movie, we should also remember that making a movie is not as easy as it seems. Our comments should be able to improve the quality of the next movie released.

Then, what aspects can we assess so that we can decide whether we love a movie or not? Easy. Change your POV and let yourself be a director for a while. There’s a lot of aspects we can assess. Like how the cast brought the characters, are they good or not? Or the plot, is it fresh and original or is it just copying the plot of the last hit movie? Or the appearance of the casts (you may assess it if you’re dying to, haha kidding), is their make up is well done or not? See?

So, I guess that’s how we should assess a movie. Assessing a movie by seeing a movie inside and out or assessing a movie from the POV of a director (plus the act of appreciating the movie for the work of the crew though the movie is awful) can really makes your head clear and able to give a strong reasonable answer and explanation when someone ask you “Do you love the movie or not?”.

So I guess that’s it. FYI, I wrote those things above because I’m kinda mad at the movie and TV programs my local TV channels provide. My local TV channels can’t even provide one truly educating program! #GodBlessIndonesia

So, I think I’m going into a hiatus for a while, my final national exam is coming up this May. I’m sorry but I gotta stay focus. Please give me your support and prayer, and I hope your life will be la vie en rose. 🙂

Arrivederci!